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Strength Based Care A Powerful Tool at Excelsior

A few months ago, a girl was transferred from another unit into my unit, Shalom. The girl was really worried about moving in because she was afraid of getting bullied by our girls. I sat down with one of our girls who had a fairly big reputation of bullying other people. I said to her, "You are one of my best leaders in cottage. The other girls look up to you and really listen to you. We have a client moving in who is afraid of getting bullied. I would like you to be her big sister and make her feel welcome." The client agreed to this and planned out a big, "Welcome to Shalom" party for the client and even baked the girl a chocolate cake for the party.

The girl who was afraid felt very welcome and special. She talked about the party for weeks. Whenever she was being bullied in cottage or in school, her new "big-sister" would stand up for her to let other girls know that bullying was not okay.

As seen in this story, Strength Based Care can be powerful. We sent a message to a scared client that she was welcome and that we were excited she was with us. We also took a client who historically used her charisma to bully and lead toward negativity and put her in a position of using her leadership skills for something positive. This created a "Win - Win" situation for both clients.

We provide strength based opportunities in every aspect of our program at Excelsior. When a girl first enters our program, we begin exploring each girl's strengths. We learn what they are good at and about their challenges. Our program provides many opportunities to build upon these strengths. These programs include sports, student leadership, exercise/nutrition programs, culinary arts, cosmetology, art, and poetry. Many of these opportunities are offered in each of the cottages as well. Girls who are leaders have the opportunity to become "Big Sister" mentors to newer clients while girls who are more challenged by leadership are given opportunities to build up their leadership skills through various campus and cottage activities. Maybe this style of leadership isn't a girl's forte but they are good at nutrition. We may have this girl help plan a well-balanced weekend menu with healthy snacks. A girl who is athletic may help facilitate exercise activities such as basketball, volleyball or yoga. The opportunities to find strengths in the girls are endless.

Strength based care isn't just about providing programs to help our girls explore and expand their strengths and talents. It also requires our staff to identify and label positive behaviors to teach our girls when they have succeeded at something. For example, when a client wakes up on time to her alarm clock, the staff may respond with, "You woke up on time with an alarm clock. That's called responsibility and it shows that you are being responsible. Good Job!" By labeling and praising positive behaviors, our girls want to repeat the same behavior thereby creating positive changes in our girls and further building their self-esteem.

Whenever I reflect on strength based care, I am reminded of the 1938 movie Boys Town with Spencer Tracy and Mickey Rooney. Spencer Tracy plays the role of Father Flanagan, the founder of Boys Town. His famous quote is, "There are no bad boys. There is only bad environments, bad training, bad examples, bad thinking." Of course, much of our training comes from Charlie Appelstein, a nationally renowned speaker and trainer in strength based care, who simply says, "There is no such thing as a bad kid". As Charlie teaches, when we interact with our girls at Excelsior, we convey an attitude to each of them that says, "I believe in all of you and I am thrilled to be working with you." We support this through our daily actions and show our girls that we mean it.